I can’t speak with authority about what happens after we die, but I AM clear that while we’re alive Life is constantly inviting us to express more of our greatness – the clearer experience and expression of who we came here to be.
I’ve been consciously aware of this since 1999 when at the end of two 10 day in person intensive coach trainings with Gay and Katie Hendricks this model was ‘birthed’ out of me. I call it The Cycle of Learning and Growing – Transforming roadblocks into stepping stones, and ever since then I’ve been deepening my appreciation of what it means and the implications it has for my and all our lives.
Bruce has a saying which he calls Rogge’s Law 🙂 “We become experts at giving to others the thing we most want for ourselves.” When I remind you that for years my coaching tagline was ‘Living Gently and Powerfully – No Matter What …’ and that in 2007 I wrote an eBook with that as part of the title, you can hear what I’ve most wanted for myself. BTW if you’re interested in the eBook you can download a copy of it here.
While I’m certainly not new to this notion, over the last couple weeks I’ve experienced yet another ’round’ of this invitation – in the abundance of opportunities to practice this, Life has been making it impossible for me to miss the reminder!
I’ve been celebrating the one year anniversary of my having moved to Columbus, and have been feeling pretty at home and comfortable with life there. A couple weeks ago, Bruce was called out of town on a business trip that stretched from the original plan of 4 days into 10. That in itself was not a challenge, but during those 10 days SO many unanticipated things happened!
To name a few, there were problems with our plumbing, heating and airconditioning systems which meant those experts were in 5 different times; my car was in for service which took a week, and as the Service Agent was arranging my rental car he said “Do you realize your Driver’s License expires today?” (in Ohio there’s no written reminder this is coming up!); I developed an infection which I thought was under control, but which got much worse one evening and required a visit to an Urgent Care Clinic (it was when I got back from that new experience I discovered the flood in our kitchen!); though I had touches from all my ‘kids’ I spent Mother’s Day alone; and the challenges seemed to be extending to the lives of a couple of my clients as well.
All of this I handled with as much grace as I could muster in each moment. What I didn’t recognize until just before Bruce returned was I’d also been judging myself for not completing other bits I’d intended to do in that time – some creative writing including re-writing the copy on my home page. That judgment is the part of me that sometimes drives me to step over myself; it’s the imperative that says if I don’t accomplish everything I’ve failed.
And I only recognized this as I was writing this comment on my friend’s Facebook page “Perhaps what you’re ‘supposed to be doing’ is being gentle with yourself and accepting where you’re at in the moment, loving those parts of you that are feeling unsettled in the waiting.” It’s remarkable how easy it is to see things in others so obviously! Seeing my comment in print it was clear I needed to (and did!) add “says she who is – at least in part – reminding herself of what she knows to be a valuable invitation to herself!”
Welcoming Bruce back home Friday night, and as we 
danced together through the weekend until he left Sunday evening, every time he held me, my eyes felt teary and my body melted into an ‘Aahhh!’ as it relaxed more deeply. I was reminded of the way I was as a child held and loved by my Nanny in Barbados, Lotta.But it wasn’t until our last embrace before he left that I got it! In that moment, I recognized the invitation to me to hold myself in my life as tenderly as he was holding, and Lotta used to hold, me.
The good news is I not only heard and accepted that invitation, but in addition to that commitment, I also committed to being gentle with myself as I’m in the process of learning how to hold myself this way and so still don’t do it perfectly!
And it’s a good thing too! Life has been pretty wild since then – this week travelling back to Toronto and then on to the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY where I’ve joined Katherine Woodward Thomas and a number of Calling in “The One” coaches as we support her live workshop over this Memorial Day weekend.
I’m definitely still on that learning curve! As I write this mid-week before leaving Toronto for Omega I can feel myself weary, BUT I’m happy to share that as I experienced in a dream on waking Monday morning, my younger self is getting the message that I AM there for her. She’s feeling the shift from me judging myself to more deeply experiencing my commitment to be looking out for her and having her back – for me right now, this is what stepping into my greatness looks like!
I’m curious. What challenging experiences have you had recently that you might reflect on through the lens of “Hmmm, I wonder? How might my greatness have been being called out here?!”How might doing so transform this from a sense of being ‘squeezed’, or in judgment of yourself and/or the experience itself into a deeper understanding of both the abundance of life, and an expanded and clearer experience of who you came here to be?And if this doesn’t ring true for where you’re at, if you’re still in the midst of the muck, please, especially in that space, be as gentle with yourself and as you can be, and as you have the energy, be open to wondering …..
As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts on these ideas, and your own experiences in the practice of recognizing and naming the ways Life is calling you into expressing the greatness of who you came here to be